so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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