he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
