So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Less talking, more tequila
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
