Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
