Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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