What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
