do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
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I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
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We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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