One girl and one boy is just not enough.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Panties = found
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
