Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
