I'm eating all of the evidence.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
