i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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