so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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