i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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