I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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