I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
