I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
