And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Alive.
So much puke
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
