wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
