Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
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