did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
