marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
