i don't plan on having that self control this summer
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
