Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
