My hair reeks of homosexuality.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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