How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Randomize