I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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