lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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