how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
