he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
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I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
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TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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