Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
