my vag is so smooth its legendary
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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