oh god the rape fog is back!
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize