Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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