This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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