he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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