the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
