Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
