i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone