What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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