I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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