its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
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