it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
