Your mouth is God's brothel.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Randomize
