we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
two words...techno handjob
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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