oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
