that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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