I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
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We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
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I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.