Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize