hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
