never play flip cup with pint glasses
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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