I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
he was CRYING into my vagina
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
